Financial Advice From a Painter Dude

[Just for the fun of it, I had AI rewrite this article in the voice of “The Dude” from The Big Lebowski. Enjoy!]

Alright, man, let’s groove into this financial wisdom – it’s like, my opinions, you know? Take ’em as such, think for yourself, and if you need it, toss in some professional advice, dude.

Your Number One Asset: Groove with Your Skills

Your real treasure? It’s your hustle, man – your skills, abilities, and talents. Develop those, live below your means, stash the rest. Here’s the lowdown:

My Savings Philosophy: Bearer Assets Rule

I’m all about “bearer assets” – things you hold without being someone else’s financial baggage. Gold in your pocket, art on your wall, a guitar in your hands, or a bitcoin key in your brain – all bearer assets. Unlike bank money, these are yours, no strings attached. Check your bank’s fine print – that money ain’t entirely yours, man.

Short Term Funds: Hold Your Nose

If you can stand the stench, keep a few war-bucks on hand for emergencies. Not ideal, but handy in a pinch because most people will still accept that fiat trash in exchange for their valuables.

Medium Term Savings: Gold and Silver, or Some Grass-Fed Ribeye Steaks, Man

Groovy, let’s talk about stashing your mid-term savings. I’m all about stable, liquid assets, and there are a couple of ways to roll:

  1. Gold and Silver, the Real Deal: Go for the classics, man – gold and silver. Hit up legit places for these shiny vibes, or, even cooler, trade something for it.
  2. Or, Go Carnivore with Grass-Fed Ribeyes: Now, here’s a wild twist. Instead of metal, how ’bout you load up your freezer with some grass-fed ribeyes? It’s like a meaty savings account, man.

Now, both options have their merits. Gold and silver – timeless, liquid, and a classic move. Grass-fed ribeyes – tasty, and your future self might thank you for having a steak stash.

So, it’s your call, dude. Shine with precious metals or sizzle with ribeyes – either way, you’re investing in your own kind of wealth.

Long Term Savings: Enter Bitcoin, the Cosmic Play

For the long haul, Bitcoin’s the star player. Easy to protect, hard to steal. Ride the wave of appreciation as the world catches on. Historical averages? Mind-blowing. No need for risky bets – just earn, save in bitcoin, and chill.

Exceptions: My Art is My Savings

In some cases, your own goods can be your stash. For me, it’s my art – my highest return on investment, my savings, my currency. No need for other forms especially since I’m an “almost famous painter dude” and holding anything other than my art is too much risk for me, man. All I need is a pencil, a piece of paper, and someone who will trade me a ribeye for one of my doodles. Remember when I said your skills are your number one vibe?

Real Estate Blues: Not My Jam Anymore

Used to dig real estate, but not anymore. It’s got issues – not liquid, never truly owned, not portable. Too many headaches. In today’s world, it’s like a sitting duck for taxes, governments, and socialist neighbors. Plus, the opportunity cost is crazy. Compare it to bitcoin, and it falls short.

Trust The Numbers

On the other hand, you can just go with the lucky numbers. 777, man. Put 77% of your savings into bitcoin, and 7% into my art. I’ll send you good vibes every time you look at it, and your bitcoin might save your bacon someday, dude. The rest? Heck, ribeyes, gold, and silver, man.

Summary: Keep it Simple, Man

This plan? It’s timeless, gonna level up your vibe, let you focus on your groove. It’s like, ride the waves, stash some bitcoin, enjoy my art, and let the good times roll. But what do I know? I’m just a painter, dude.

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